We've got a lot to fight about. let's do it wisely.
How to fight well
Conflict is not a problem to be solved. It tells us we've discovered what matters most. If you can stay with it, you can hear what it has to tell you.This is how we break old patterns and find new ways forward.How to Fight Well is a practice that teaches you how to steady yourself in the middle of conflict and listen for what's needed.
Learn the practice
Conflict training
Small group courses guide you through the models and tools needed to skilfully navigate conflict.Combining Nonviolent Communication, western Psychology and neurophysiology, you'll learn how to show up to difficult conversations with curiousity and calm.The course schedule for 2025 is:- Spring: February 25th
- Summer: 3rd June
- Autumn: 9th September.Every course runs on a Pay What You Can fee model.Get in touch for course information and to register interest.
Get support
Conflict coaching
One-to-one coaching supports you to work through your challenges while building your skills and confidence.Coaches, mediators and facilitators use these sessions to add more depth to their conflict skills and develop new tools.Leaders, parents and partners use them to understand why some relationships become stuck and how they can untangle them with care.Coaching runs on a Pay What You Can basis, either as one-off sessions or a longer term programme.Get in touch to arrange an exploratory conversation.
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About Max
Making sense of the mess
I've been teaching people how to work with healthy conflict since 2015.Much of what I teach has been learned through my professional experience: working in a dysfunctional, multinational organisation, closing down a company and laying off colleagues, and supporting senior leaders across the public and private sector as a consultant and coach .But the honest truth is that being a parent of two children, partner in a relationship, forest school teacher, martial artist and ex-doorman have been just as influential in my work.Formally I have trained in Nonviolent Communication and Participatory Leadership, along with qualifications in counselling and therapy. All of these experiences feed into the work I do supporting people who want to see their relational challenges from new perspectives.More about me on LinkedIn
Written resources
Free writing
I've written about all the principles and practices in my work, so that anyone can work on their relationship with conflict.Good places to start are:
- Judgement, blame and our unmet needs
- Drama, victimhood and endless invitations
- Steadying yourself in conflictRead all my articles on Medium here
Stay up-to-date
Newsletter & podcast
I publish an infrequent newsletter that includes new writing, course updates and links to new podcast episodes.Here are some shortcuts to my most popular episodes.
- How to listen to your Needs
- What can we agree on?
- Getting better at boundariesGet more like this delivered to your inbox via Substack
In your own time
online training course
The How to Fight Well training course is available online, for you to take alone, from home, whenever you want.It covers all of the key principles and tools from the small group course, and includes cheat sheets and reference materials for you to come back to when you need a reminder.Find out more and watch the trailer here
Training feedback
Navigate complexities
"If you want a practical and deep understanding of how to successfully navigate the complexities of conflicts we find ourselves in, then Max is the guide you've been looking for."- Tom, Executive Coach and Facilitator
It felt unique
"This didn't feel like any of our other training sessions. Not just someone talking at you and information overload. We were actually vulnerable in front of our colleagues and admitted we aren't perfect. Max as a trainer was very easy to talk to."- Marsha, Team Leader
Coaching feedback
Now I have courage
"I now have courage - there is no need to avoid conflict only approach it in the right way. Like if you walk behind a horse it will kick you but if you approach with care you can ride off into the sunset."- Liz, Chief Executive
A true understanding
"I now have a true understanding of the pressure I put on myself and how to reclaim my locus of evaluation. It has opened up my professional world to be able to challenge the status quo and not fear the response."- Susie, Founder
Find out more
Start a conversation
If you'd like to talk about what you need and how I can help, drop me your details below and I'll get in touch. Alternatively, email me at hello@maxstjohn.com